Hampton Happy

Apparently houses in the Hamptons rent for an exorbitant price during the summer.  We’re talking big bucks.


Some houses rent for as much as $75,000 for the summer (8 or 9 ever so short weeks).  I’m sure this number goes way up depending on proximity to the beach, etc.  Even if this number were inflated by $20,000, renting requires large annual salaries or at least lots of credit.


Being a simpleton, I think I would rather invest in property of my own rather than to spend such a grand sum on renting each summer.  (Right now I’m just thinking of a shed for next summer.)  My opinion really doesn’t matter and since I’m not an economist, what do I know?


So, Biff, Muff, the kids and well groomed pets move into a professionally decorated, fully restored cottage in the Hamptons.  Muff, anticipating a blissful summer, cannot entertain in an already furnished rental home.  Why what would the Howells think?  How could we sit on someone else’s couch or use their blender? 


No, this may be fine for common folk, but not for the socially, financially, and cosmetically elite vacationing in the Hamptons.


Besides, what skills could a professional designer possess that Muff hasn’t already mastered.  Why she shops the latest trends, buys only the most expensive art displayed in renown galleries, and of course knows what the Jones are doing.


Being a husband of deep pockets, Biff hires movers and packers who haul their fine furniture and treasured pieces out to the Hamptons.  All current furniture in the house is relegated to the basement and replaced with comfortable icons from home.


This migratory ritual takes place summer after summer.  Movers never tiring of collecting fat checks and Biff never tiring of pleasing Muff. 


All are Hampton happy.


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