Bookstore Blues

I felt a cool breeze finger my hair as the young girl on line turned her face toward me and asked, “Where are the Biology books?’

I stammered in response.  My brain couldn’t process a logical answer because my receptors were transmitting excessive signals.

My eyes were fixed on her baby blues.

Yes, once again, my family enjoyed a stimulating Friday night at Barnes & Nobles.  I haven’t decided if we lead such a pathetic existence that a bookstore can excite us or if we are just nerds.  I’m leaning towards nerds.

We may get a family discount on pocket protectors this Christmas.

My daughters tags along, flips through a picture book or two, and plays with the stuffed animals.  I think she’s drooled on most of them, so I wouldn’t consider purchasing any.

I love FringeMan to death, but he only agrees to bookstore outings because they have a Starbucks Cafe.  If it weren’t for Starbucks, our bookstore adventures would be torture for him, especially since he’s beyond drooling on stuffed animals.

Back to the biology section…

When this young woman blinked, images surfaced of Greco-Roman days when servants fanned their masters with palm fronds. Instantly I realized the breeze filtering through my hair came from her eyelashes.

I was impressed…almost blown away!

No mascara I’ve seen can create lashes as thick as a well-groomed lawn.  Not only were her lashes thick, but they were also so long that she would never be able to wear a pair of sunglasses.  Mary Kay and Estee Lauder couldn’t begin to create what I was seeing.

My brain slowly recovered and I directed her to the reference desk.  Standing in awe, I took in the thin, gauzy tank and yoga-like capris.  Floral apliques bounced on her behind.  She was sporting butt bling.  This outfit came complete with flip-flops (the cheese-slice type).

I’m still attempting to reconcile the gym look with the red-carpet lashes.

I continue to be mystified.

Of course I’m not naive enough to believe these lashes were real – the hair type.  They were plastic, but fascinating nonetheless.

Fake lashes are making a come-back.  I’m just wondering WHY?

Educate me, please.


21 thoughts on “Bookstore Blues

  1. Pingback: A Place for Nerds | the domestic fringe

  2. Kara-Noel

    One of my friends is a hair stylist and she is creating a website so she enlisted her friends to be “models” (this is going somewhere, I promise…) and since we are thrifty I get my hair done about once a year. My roots were 4 inches long and she thought my before and after pictures would be dramatic. She did my hair and make-up like a modern Marilyn Monroe, complete with fake eye lashes. I’m telling you… I never felt more glamorous or sexy and when my hubby came to pick me up… well… he was quite impressed too!!
    I’ll be blogging about it soon…

  3. Hat Chick

    No here’s the worst part….you can plop your butt-blinged bottom into a chair at a KIOSK in the MIDDLE of the mall and get your eyebrows and eyelashes sewn it at. the. same. time.

    In the middle of the mall! With everybody WATCHING.

    Public plastic surgery, anyone? anyone?


    Oh yes, and it’s been so for awhile. And extensions are something people go have put on every few weeks like people get manicures or highlights.

    I’ve got a friend who wears them and her Sophia Loren eyeliner to bed! I just applaud her for her efforts. I don’t know how she does it. But she’s been doing it for years, ahead of her time.

  5. Fragrant Liar

    NOOOOOO! Say it ain’t so! No bringy the fakey lashes back. I have a hard time with the clown look. And trying to get those things off and on? Yeesh, just kill me now. So let’s take a vote shall we? All those in favor of bucking the trend, say aye!


  6. Mama Belle

    OK, confession time … I bought a pair a few months ago thinking I might wear them when I’m on-stage. But, fear set in and the fact that I couldn’t get the dang things glued on in the right spot as to not look ridiculous. I still have one more pair. When I muster up the courage to put them on, I’ll let you know. That sounds like a good post idea. Hmmm …

  7. portugalbound

    I’m with David..Starbucks intimidates me. When it’s mine turn at the counter and I just listened to 4 or 5 teens and twenty somethings rattle off a long list of things and they only actually got one coffee drink with whipped cream…I just go blank. What was all that…tall, half, no fat, whipped, caramel, ice and froth about? I start asking questions and the other 4 or 5 really hip 20 somethings behind me start huffing and tapping their feet. That’s when I walk out…..

    No Fringegirl…I’M the nerd. Nerds are the overweight 30 somethings that nervously walk of our Starbucks.

    I’d call you a hopeless romantic. Family night at the book store. I LOVED those nights out with my family. All of us in different sections…no butt bling passing by me though…I miss book stores.

  8. Cher

    My question is: Do women wear them for men? Or do they wear them for themselves?

    No man I know is attracted to anything that comes off during the night and looks like a bug on a pillow!

    The Texas Woman

  9. Erin

    I don’t know why. Because they are just that alluring, I suppose. But your writing of it here, a simple moment in a bookstore, (OH MY GOD, a book store! Do you know how exciting that is to me? We don’t have one!) your writing of it is chocolate on the tongue this morning, so sweet. Butt bling. The breeze. Love it.

  10. David

    Thanks for the heads up on the stuffed animals. Not that I was really in the market anyway. I love coffee, but I always feel a bit intimidated at Starbucks. Too many choices and mysterious names. So I usually say something stupid, like “Give me something that’s hot and still tastes mostly like coffee, but with some vanilla flavoring and maybe a little froth on top.”

  11. Sara's Sweet Surprise

    Books, coffee, pastries, I’d say that’s a pretty good date night! There may be a drooly plush pal included if you make that latte “to go.” My hubby always finds hope in the “TO GO”! He likes to think it’s applys to me too. Even after 26 years he thinks if he projects those two small words from his lips it will get me headed towards the nearest exit. I usually reply…. sorry the (Star) buck stops here, I’m not done shopping….

    Fake eyelashes….they’ll have to come up with an easier application, like oil and water we don’t mix. I find it a tad unsettling loading a strip of glue so close to my retinas!

    Sweet Wishes,

  12. Steph at the Red Clay Diaries

    I think I would’ve thought “something” was different about the girl’s eyes. But if I figured out it was the lashes at all, it would’ve been 5 hours later, sitting at home.

    I don’t think I’d like false lashes. #1, they’d mess with my glasses. And #2, I’m so OCD about stuff in my eye that I can’t even try to wear contacts. The lashes wouldn’t look so pretty with red, watery eyes.

  13. robinaltman

    That’s hilarious! I feel silly answering this question as though I really know something, but – I think fake lashes were in for a bit when J Lo brought in the whole fake lashes/fake tan look. Now, an entire fringe of fake lash is out, but a few individual lashes discretely glued to the outside of the upper lash line is in for a night out.

    No fake lash looks were ever in for working at Borders. Sheesh.

  14. tckk

    Too funny about the lashes. Hubby and I love to do a Barnes and Noble night. A couple weeks ago we had a night out and after dinner, Barnes and Noble is where we went. Loved it and just mentioned yesterday to him that we need to do it again. If that makes us nerds, so be it!! 🙂


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