I am not a morning person.
I can find no way of sugar coating that fact. To know me is to know not to speak me until I’ve been awake for at least three hours. It’s not that I hate your guts in the morning, because I don’t. My brain just cannot process voices and words until it has had time to slowly come to life.
I snooze my alarm, currently my phone alarm since my daughter took back her clock, at least 5 times before turning it off. I then roll out of bed, trip over the dog, and stumble my way into the bathroom.
You see, I don’t drink caffeine. Well, I do use small doses of caffeine on rare occasions, but only when absolutely necessary.
The rest of you use coffee or diet coke to awaken your brains, but I am a purest. I use time.
My children know not to ask the tough questions in the morning. “Why are we out of frozen waffles?” That question needs to wait until lunchtime to be asked. They know just to grab something else – cereal, banana, yogurt, granola bars, dog food – anything else.
Needless to say, I don’t dress up for the morning bus stop. I realize some do. They actually put on day clothes and comb their hair before greating their bus drivers, but I do not.
I stand in the rain, cold, and snow in my slippers, pajama pants, and crazy hair. At times I think I should at least purchase new pajama pants. You see, I’m still wearing this pair of blue and red plaid sleepy pants that my sister-in-law, Kelly, had the wisdom of throwing out several years ago. They were once flannel, but all the flannel seems to have washed away. I noticed they are developing wear holes. I’m just thankful they’re still in inconspicuous places.
I live on a busy street. At street where at least 4 or 5 cars pass me by in the morning beeping and waving. I know these people, but usually don’t recoginize them until several hours later. I told you that my brain is slow in the morning.
Do I need a point?
My point – Are you a morning person? More importantly, do you dress up for the bus?
If you said yes to the second question, please give the rest of us late risers a break and at least leave off the lipstick at 7 am.