Confounding Confusion

There are some mysteries in life, things I will never understand.  I realize I’m somewhat simple, but am I that far from having an average IQ?

That was a purely rhetorical question.

Maybe you could help shed some light on my dimwittedness.

First of all, what are spray nylons? 

Does nylon thread actual spray through the nozzle?  I’m afraid I’d end up with a webbed look on my legs.  People may think I’ve been tousled by Spider-Man or something.  FringeMan would be jealous.

I see the bottles sitting on the shelf in Walgreens and I’m tempted to pick one up.  After all, like most women, I hate nylons.  They are hot, tight, and uncomfortable.  If I could cover my shaving polka-dots, pillow-case white skin, and mosquito bites with some spray, why not? 

That sounds wonderful!

Do these spray nylons come in control-top or body shaper?

Ladies, have you used spray nylons?  Do tell! 

Men, if you’ve used these, please don’t tell me.  I can’t handle it.

Second, are the PETA people really upset with the President for slapping a fly that landed on his leg during an interview? 


I mean there are so many other things to be upset about.  Are they actually concerned with a fly’s psyche?

Should we campaign to remove fly tape from all hardware stores in America?  Should we waste money on humane fly traps?

Help me readers!  Impart your wisdom.

If you didn’t read Part 1 of my Dream House saga, click HERE.  Part 2 will be coming soon.


20 thoughts on “Confounding Confusion

  1. caprik

    I have never heard of spray nylons, but I am not a fan of any sort of nylons.

    Peta and the fly? I have no words for that kind of nonsense.

  2. Rachel @ CalledtoGrow

    Spray nylons! I am headed to the nearest Wal-greens this afternoon! Sounds like an excellent experiment for two cooped up kids. 🙂

    Apparently PETA forgot to send the fly the memo that the refuge is at my house…at least that is what these fly’s who have taken up residence in my kitchen are telling me.

  3. Evergreen

    It’s ridiculous to see the most important thing the news writes about is Obama swatting a fly. Come on!! When will the stupidity stop?

    Never tried the spray on nylons, figured that whatever came out would just get over everything.

    Let us know if you try it!! 😉

  4. Merryheart

    PETA later claimed they were joking, but they did send Obama a humane insect trap for catch & release! For next time, presumably.

    The POTUS finally showed some strength. Too bad he doesn’t use it in dealing with foreign governments.


  5. mike S

    I’m a guy with hairy legs, so I won’t comment on the nylons.
    I’m no fan of the ‘bama, but I was beaming with pride when he nailed that fly with such grace and precision!
    It’s the best thing he’s done during his whole term!
    I thought PETA was like Greek bread……?

  6. Mom

    Just go without the stockings! Any fly buzzing(or landing) around me deserves to be swatted at. For heaven sakes—we have starving people in this world who can benefit from the energy and money PETA wastes on silly, meaningless things.

  7. Debbie York

    First off, who calls them nylons anymore? Second, isn’t that just spray tan? I used leg makeup one time…it ended up on everything it came in contact with AND as the evening grew warmer, it proceeded to streak down my legs! Lovely!!!
    Maybe PETA needs to rethink their statement…could be flies are the missing WMD’s!

  8. David

    PETA shouldn’t blame Obama for the fly incident. Their beef (pun intended) is with the guy who typed, “swat fly” on Obama’s teleprompter.

  9. diana/sunshine

    i, too, have never heard of spray nylons. it sounds like a spray tan, but then why wouldn’t they just call it that?

    and, i, too, think it’s ridiculous that the peta people have a problem with the swatting a fly. it cracks me up and makes me sad to think how these people think.

  10. Mindy

    Never heard of the spray nylon things. Be our lab rat. K?

    PETA. Obama. Fly. They could all fall off a cliff for all I care. Seriously.


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