As I sit in my golden chair feeling the cool breeze blow through my living room window, I realize that fall is quickly approaching.  Unlike many other states, New York has not beckoned my children back to school yet, so it’s still “summer” for us.  However, I feel the sunshine waning, see the leaves straining to hold their color, and know that I still need to purchase school supplies.

By the time I get around to school shopping, there should be all of three pencils and  one slightly broken bottle of bargain brand glue left on the shelves.  I intended to shop early this year, but good intentions are basically worthless, at least for me.

I still haven’t received my children’s classroom assignments yet, so I don’t know what their teachers require to ‘start school’.  Life would be so easy if there were one master list of supplies for the entire second grade, third grade, fourth grade, fifth grade…you get my point.  Why each teacher needs a different list of supplies is beyond me, but that’s probably because I’m not a teacher.  Oh, for the days when kids just needed to bring an apple and a piece of chalk to school.

I’m getting sidetracked.  The point of my post is that with the coming of fall I’ve made some decisions.


1.  I’m not going to Twitter anymore.  Earth-shattering, isn’t it?  I haven’t tweeted in a month and I just don’t miss it.  It’s not just a time-waster, because if I’m truthful, I love wasting time.   I’ve nearly reached professional status as a time waster.  I may start a consulting firm that specializes in raising awareness to combat employee time-wasting strategies.  I just feel no draw to tweet, so I’m done.  I tried it.  I liked it.  I got bored with it.  In fact I did the same thing with exercising, but that’s another post.


2.  I’m not the kind of mother who dreads hearing their children were in a little spat…a fight…knockdown…whatever you’d like to call it.  Now don’t get worried, I don’t have a boxing ring in my basement and I don’t promote violence, but I do think that there is a time when a child needs to defend him or herself.  There’s a certain invisible line of propriety that must not be crossed by another and if it is, I believe at times it is appropriate to throw a punch.


My daughter comes in saying the child (a nameless boy who has repeatedly been mean to FringeKid) down the street tried to pull down her shorts.  Twice.  I told her that the next time he tries something like that, she should throw him a punch right smack in the kisser.  I mean, if someone tried to pull my shorts down (FringeMan excluded…mom, close your ears or eyes), I’d have to punch him in a place that hurts more than his kisser.

I don’t think we should ever look for a fight in life, but I do think there’s a time to fight.

**insert favorite movie quote**

” There is a certain kind of peace that is only known on the other side of war.” -Sean Connery, The Hunt for Red October

Like the time when I was about eleven and this boy (Robby) continuously annoyed me to the point where I experienced temporary insanity.  He went beyond what is good and acceptable antagonizing behaviors for pre-adolescent boys and propelled me beyond the threshold of patience.  I brought him to his knees with one good punch in the jaw and sent his glasses flying into the next zip code. Problem solved.

The point of a childhood spat is that when you need to defend yourself, you must walk away the winner.

Now don’t run scared on me.  I’m not raising a couple of hooligans with violence issues that will need to spend the next 16 and half years in anger management classes.  Keep things in perspective.


3.  I will not become addicted to hot chocolate no matter how cold it gets this winter.

And those are the decisions that may revolutionize my fall.

Or not.

You making any decisions this fall?

Because I’m curious, have you ever told your child to throw a punch?


23 thoughts on “Decisions

  1. DJ

    And I SO admire you for quitting twitter!
    Life is short.
    Use your time for worthwhile pursuits…and YOU get to decide what falls into that category!

  2. DJ

    When I was a kid, my older brother taught me how to do a combination called “block & sock.”
    It certainly came in handy in my teen years when an ignorant boy thought he could touch a girl with no consequences. He thought differently when he landed up against some lockers.

  3. Tabitha (From Single to Married)

    Hmm… this fall? I’m just looking forward to not being hot anymore. Although I’ll be finishing my 2nd and my 3rd trimester during the fall, so I’m thinking I may be hot anyway. 🙂

    ps – I know what you mean about Twitter. I keep trying to get into it but haven’t yet.

  4. Liz

    I have to admit, Twitter is lost on me. But I do it anyway, because… I’m not sure. But not very often. And my sisters and I fought like cats and dogs… it was good for us.

  5. Nina in Portugal

    I don’t like twitter either. I make an appearance every month or so….but maybe after you’ve paved the way…I can quit altogether too…

    I agree with you….kids need to stand up for themselves.

  6. Jenn

    THANK YOU FOR QUITTING TWITTER!!! That is the dumbest thing to me!!!

    Good for you!!! Tell Annaliese to let him have it! Coming from my own personal experiences with Robby (i.e. throwing him into a wall), sometimes a good sock in the nose/other areas are completely necessary.

    One must be able to defend themselves against bullies. And if this boy continues to bother FringeBoy as well, FringeBoy might have to send him a message as well.

  7. Pilar

    I only have girls, and like you, i have told my girls that if a boy try to pass the line, to hit them as hard as they can and run to the teacher or mommy, whoever is the one close.
    Of course I didn´t think I was going to have to tell them this early since my oldest is only 7.
    One day i went to pick up my middle daugther from school and her shirt was full of blood. I asked the teacher what happen and she told me that she bump heads with a boy. I went home and as my daugther. She told me that a boy asked her to be his girlfriend and she told him no. then the boy wanted a kiss and she also told him no. So then the boy try to get it anyway. And trying he bump her in the nose. So i told her next time he ask and she says no, if he tries again, then hit him and go running to your teacher and tell her what had happen.
    Next day I told the teacher and she told me that all the kids where playing with the boyfriend and girlfriend thing (again, they are 5) and kissing each other. Well, I told her my girl didn´t want to and that she needed to stop it. she tried to make it look like it wasn´t a big deal so I told her that my daugther was told by her father to hit the boy enxt time, so if the next “normal” thing for my daughter to do was punch boys, she would know why. Of course, my daughter came back the next day and told me that her teacher told everyone they were no allow to kiss, or do the boyfriend/girlfriend thing anymore. what are the parents letting those kids watch?????
    sorry, i didn´t mean to take over your comments. 🙂

  8. Lois Lane II

    I totally agree that sometimes the “victims” just need to stand up to a bully. One good punch (or slap, as what I did in high school to a boy) is usually all it takes.

    I run for many reasons. 😉 I started running after my husband was diagnosed with diabetes and his dad acted like a jerk about the whole thing, and it served as a stress-reliever. Now with my new fall classes starting up and changes in life possibly coming, I find running a LOT will keep me sane, haha!

    Maybe. 😉 LOL.

  9. Jill

    I’m on twitter. Can’t remember the last time I tweeted. I do feel like I’m talking to myself.

    We’ve taught all our kids to defend themselves if necessary. There are times when you have to stand up for yourself.

    I live in Florida. I miss hot chocolate. And fall. And seasons. *sigh*

  10. caprik

    I did tell our son to knock a kids block off once. That kid was shocked, and I never heard about him again.

    I am so with you on the Twitter business. Who has time for all that anyway? But I’m not on Facebook either, so what do I know.

    Fall decisions? Haven’t thought that far ahead yet.

  11. Mom

    Annaliese has enough power in her swing to get him down with the first punch! Take a stand Annaliese and reclaim your peaceful play area.

  12. Hat Chick

    I don’t *get* twitter, so I have no idea what I’m missing….according to you, not much.

    Giving another kid the smackdown? At my house the motto is “I didn’t start it, but I’ll finish it.” Pulling down pants is seriously crossing the line….FringeGirl needs to put that kid in his place.

    As for Fall decisions, fall won’t be here until November in Little Town, Big State. I’ll think about then.

  13. Jo@Mylestones

    I’m proud of you for deciding about Twitter. I thought I had given it up (10 days, didn’t miss it), but I jumped back in this week. I still might chuck it, mostly because it feels like I am just talking to myself, or talking to other people who don’t hear me until 5 hours later.
    As for throwing a punch….I’m with you 100%. One hundred percent.
    Love those pictures. Your new environment upstate must be a bit more….peaceful? (except for the bully down the street).

  14. EagleGirl

    I’ve got a good quote, from The Lord of the Rings!

    “It needs but one foe to breed a war…And those who have not swords can still die upon them.” Eowyn.

    Boy, I love that quote…

  15. Mama Belle

    I have not ever told my child to throw a punch. However, I did tell her teacher that she would not be punished for punching a child in the face who would not stop acting like he was going to punch her. A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.

    Twitter … will never do it. (probably not)

    Hot chocolate … sure … we’ll see about that decision.

  16. robinaltman

    I think I’m bored with Twitter, too. It’s not that exciting. Now I’ll just walk over to my neighbors and inform them that I’ve just eaten a great apple.

    My husband constantly told my kids to punch bullies in the face. They thought he was nuts. They would say, “Dad, we’ll be thrown out of school!” And Adam would say, “Yeah, but they’ll stop bothering you.”

    Adam and I agree with you – one good punch that hurts and a bully will always stop.

  17. Gabriela

    I most certainly have taught my sweet little girl to throw punches and to kick her oppressor in the knees so she doesn’t leave any evidenciary bruises. I’ve also taught her to holler loudly enough for a teacher or other adult to hear “Quit bullying me”. Earlier this year, when a nasty boy stole her personalized pencils (PERSONALIZED!) and carved/scratched her name off most of them, she followed him off the bus and shoved him hard enough to land him into a ditch then told him she was going to do that every day until he returned her pencils. Needless to say she got her defaced pencils back the very next morning. We’re talking about my straight A honor student who won the Presidential Academic Excellence award from President Obama this year. Yes, there’s always more than one way to skin a cat. I applaud you for teaching FringeKid to throw a punch when necessary. My hat’s off to you.

  18. Mindy

    You just had to mention the gold chair.

    Never twittered. I don’t think people care when I brush my teeth. Or if I eat wheat crackers.

    Not a hot chocolate drinker. But, don’t get between me and my Pennsylvania Dutch Eggnog.

    I was not a puncher, I was a scratcher. I didn’t have long nails, but I knew how to use what I had and I used ’em. Never had a child to advise. But, sounds good to me!

    My fall decision is to take truckloads to the antique show in Warrenton and come home with nothing but money. Amen.


  19. Sarah@Life in the Parsonage

    I gave up twitter too. I tried to like it…I just couldn’t.

    I always think I’ll be able to give up the hot chocolate, turns out I fall off the wagon every year.

    I love that you told her to punch him. I whole-heartedly agree! Can I say AMEN? I think I just did…

  20. Janna Qualman

    Not thus far, but my oldest is having troubles with a couple boys on the bus. Do you think I should teach her a good one-two?

    I love your pictures. The peace of them takes away from your post’s violent content…


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