The Perfect Woman

Warning:  This is a post where I get all ‘spiritual’ on you and maybe even a little bit preachy.  I understand that not all of my readers believe exactly like I do and I love that.  I just want to remind you that all’s free in blogland.  If you don’t want to read today’s post, you are free to click the ‘x’ in the upper right hand corner.  I won’t be insulted one little bit as long you’re not insulted that I occasionally choose to write about my beliefs.   Fair?  So either you can share your thoughts in the comment section or I’ll see you tomorrow, but there are no hard feelings either way. 😉

I once had the pleasure of meeting the perfect woman.

She showed up at the park with a starched dress and four spit-and-shined children wrapped in matching outfits, not an unruly hair to found on the five of them.  After talking to her for minute, I found out that she never fights with her husband, has children who don’t lie, and actually retouches her makeup at night in order to look her best for bedtime.

As I listened to each charm laced word that slipped from her polished lips, I found myself slinking further into my mac & cheese stained sweatshirt.  You see , my crying lying kid just wiped her runny nose on my arm and left a buggery shadow of humanness as a reminder.  We are not perfect.  Not any one of us in my family, including my sorry excuse for a man’s best friend.

Selfishness has been known to slither its way into my heart and cause chaos in our home.  My marriage is a union of two strong-willed and slightly pig-headed individuals who need to work on submitting ourselves to one another every day.  Even my children sometimes make foolish choices, use their tongues instead of their minds, and act before considering the consequences.  In fact, they are over-energized, smaller versions of ourselves.  We are a human bunch and sinful too.  Forgiven and striving to live holy lives pleasing to our heavenly father, but sinful just the same.

We have not yet found perfection.

In a way, I way rejoice in these human deficiencies of mine, because I know God is still working on me.  I’m not so tidy that He can’t clean me up and make me shine for Him.  I still go to His Word because I need supernatural strength and wisdom beyond my capabilities.  I don’t have it all figured out, but I know the one who sees the beginning from the end.  He looks down on my very human, sin-scarred self and sees the righteousness of His son, the only truly perfect one to walk this earth.

There is a passage in the Bible that says this:  highlighted phrases are definitions of possibly unfamiliar words

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; Being justified [declared innocent or guiltless] freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus: Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation [the act of appeasing wrath] through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God;  To declare, I say, at this time his righteousness: that he might be just, and the justifier of him which believeth in Jesus.  Romans 3:23-26

Instead of feeling guilt and defeat in my humanness, I want to rejoice.  If I never yelled at my kids, threatened the dog with death, thought that my husband can just eat dirty snow for dinner, allowed a foul mood to darken my face, or offended a church lady, I would not see my sin.  When I fail, I know exactly what area of my heart, mind, or body needs to be yielded to His control.

Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God.  Romans 6:13

I don’t want to be so strong that I have no need to lean on the rock, but I don’t want to be so weak that I forget I am more than a conquerer in Christ.

At times I think we women are on the quest for perfection rather than Godliness.  We want to project the image that we’ve got it all under control, even if God has no control.  Sometimes we get so consumed with what others are seeing and saying that we forget about what God is seeing – our heart.

The Bible states in 1 Samuel 16:7 that “the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart.”

Our heart, it’s what God really desires from us in the first place.  He wants it more than he wants us to look nice, or keep our floors mopped, or sing in church on Sunday, or iron our kid’s clothes.  Maybe with a lot of work we can appear to be that perfect woman, but it means nothing if God doesn’t have our hearts.

And I’ll let you in on a little secret…Sometimes it’s easier to look perfect than it is to be holy.

If you would like to read similar types of posts, you can click on the links below.

Playing God

What I’m Learning About Faith

My Last Starbucks Coffee

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27 thoughts on “The Perfect Woman

  1. brightbunch5plus1

    What a great post. You had me crying on another one (sobbing actually) then I decided I needed to find something funny to read…..and well….. you still have me crying. haha… I didn’t want to cry tonight, lol!

    Reply
  2. Cathy

    I liked this post the first time I read it (I’m the first commenter above). And I still love this post. Very well said. I too am not perfect (real big surprise there isn’t it?), but God is teaching me so much. Of course, sometimes I forget to listen to Him and He has to about hit me over the head. But thankfully, I don’t have to be perfect, just forgiven. And again thankfully, He’s the one that does the forgiving and He is definitely perfect at tht and everything else He does. I’m so glad I came back and read this again today. Thanks for sharing your heart.

    Reply
  3. Elizabeth Channel

    Ooohhh, that’s a good one! I so easily fall prey to feeling rotten about myself and my life when faced with someone who seems to have it all together. Even more difficult for me are the “great-sayers” — people who always say that things are so, so great. I just can’t take people like that any more…maybe it’s old age, or maybe it’s that a lack of authenticity is like nails on chalkboard for me. Loved this post!

    Reply
  4. DJ

    {{{ BIG HUGS! }}} to an imperfect sister I’ll meet someday on the far side from an imperfect sister who types this with grandbaby sleepy-drool on her clothing, and wears it as a badge of honor and love.

    Praise Him. Always.

    Reply
  5. Patti Lacy

    Tricia, BEAUTIFUL writing. Love that “image.” As a 55-year-young-un, I’ve learned that those “perfect” facades often hide very imperfect, very unhappy women.

    So lavish in God’s perfect plan for all of our imperfect lives!

    Reply
  6. Amber

    I hate that. How we (I) look at other women and feel we aren’t doing things right. We feel we aren’t up to par. I hate it. But I know that our feelings are our biggest problems sometimes. I know WHAT the big book says and it holds the truths God gave us. I am so glad I know them and trust them and that when I am feeling less-than it’s only for a moment because my feelings are flighty!!

    Reply
  7. caprik

    “In a way, I way rejoice in these human deficiencies of mine, because I know God is still working on me.”

    When I was young, I used to doubt my salvation all the time. I would think maybe I should ask Jesus into my heart one more time, just in case I didn’t do it right before.
    As I became a more mature believer, and became more aware as a student of God’s word, I realized that the Holy Spirit convicted me of my sins. That made me so happy! I realized the Holy Spirit would not convict those who were not His OWN! I never doubted again!

    I also love it when He is working on me. It means He loves me enough to correct me, and I am thankful.
    No quest for perfection here.

    Reply
  8. Debbie York

    Tricia, once again I am wordless. I too am going to print this out as a gentle reminder. Perfect? In a lifetime, I would never be perfect, but through His grace I am who I am…promised perfection to be seen in Heaven.
    Debbie

    Reply
  9. Mom

    Tricia, This can be a page in the book you need to write!! Thank you for the gentle reminder that God looks at my heart and not the outside appearance which can sometimes seem “all together” for those who are watching me. Love you!

    Reply
  10. MissCaron

    Great post! I know that what happens in my life is not for me but for others … if I was perfect I’d never be able to either relate to those who aren’t nor be able to show them that despite these trials I am still beloved by my heavenly Father. I have learned that it is so very important that I am not perfect and that it reminds me that the only perfect person was Christ and I am not to be sad with my imperfections but to embrace them.

    Reply
  11. Jill

    So very true! It’s hard not look at someone else’s “perfection” and be jealous. Thank you for reminding me that everyone still needs to be worked on.

    Reply
  12. Mike S

    Good stuff.
    I’m blessed to have had you and John help me out and for his no “sugar coating” sermons.
    Keep blogging for HIM!
    >

    Reply
  13. Lianne

    Yay! I’m glad I’m not the only woman who pales in comparison to the Proverbs 31 woman. But you know what? I’m glad God loves me just as much as He does the “perfect” woman.

    Reply
  14. Dani Joy

    This is an incredibly well written post! It´s light yet convicting. Funny yet serious! It´s gripping! I agree 100% yet want to say I havce it all together. I know I don´t though and it´s then that Yes, I turn to my Lord and call for Him. I sometimes have to crawl back to Him.

    Holiness is also an outflowing of the heart. So we can not truly be holy unless our hearts are right.

    Great post, Tricia!

    Reply
  15. Sydney

    Okay, I read it and I am not offended, just want to say that I think some polished someone is living in denial. Just an observation, not a judgment. Have you ever read C.S. Lewis’ “Til We Have Faces”? Its all about living behind a mask of who we perceive we want to be or who we think we should be and never letting our true selves show. Good read, hard read but good.

    Reply
  16. Mindy

    “I don’t want to be so strong that I have no need to lean on the rock, but I don’t want to be so weak that I forget I am more than a conquerer in Christ.” I am printing this for a daily reminder. Thank you. ~Mindy

    Reply

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