ate a few M&M’s.
Now don’t start wagging your finger in my face, because I’ve been doing really well in the food department. I’ve eaten more oranges and bananas than the giant gorilla at our local zoo, but tonight I had to have a few M&M’s – only a few.
I also went swimming in a real pool, not the back of a pick-up. The water was spectacular. I am definitely counting it as exercise, because I swam laps, did leg lifts, and acted like I was in a geriatric water-aerobics class. Therefore my M&M’s are canceled out.
FringeMan says I’m like the guy on the TV commercial who is riding an exercise bike while drinking in order to cancel out the calories for drinking, except I am eating. It’s possible that you may see me doing jumping-jacks while chewing a steak. Unfortunately I cannot guarantee I will not be in public.
I also almost sent my daughter to reform school, a convent, the pound, or anyplace that would take her on short notice. After coming out in my new swimsuit, she took one look at me and said, “Wow, you look pregnant.”
Then she said, “I wish that bathing suit came in another color.”
Wolf-spiders eat their young.
Seriously, I have a lot of problem areas (namely my marshmallow legs), but I do not look pregnant. Thankfully my son stood up for me and said, “I saw her pregnant and she didn’t look like that. I remember.”
I am also thinking about painting these cute little owls I purchased for seventy-five cents. I have three, but now I wish I had bought them all. Regret is a terrible thing, even on twenty-five cent items.
I am also praying about something big. Part of this prayer includes earning an extra thousand dollars this month. Remember the parting of the Red Sea, the Flood, the Water into Wine? Greater things have happened. So will you pray with me please?
Hey, you have not, because you ask not. It says that in the Bible.