How NOT to Parent

FringeMan and I played a terrible little trick on my son the other day.  Remember when we almost got food poisoning from the questionable Mexican restaurant?  Well, after our dinner, we ran into Rite Aid so I could pick up a bottle of Benadryl.  I have histamines that think they are superheros.  Zyrtec and Singulair in the morning are not strong enough to stop them from causing chaos in my body, I have to throw a few Bendaryl into the mix just for fun.

As I strolled through the aisles, I spotted a end-cap full of cars.  Jokingly I said, “We should pick one of these up for FringeBoy and tell him we bought him a car.”

You see, my twelve year-old son is currently obsessed with getting an old car to fix up.  He wants it ready and waiting for when he turns sixteen, the legal driving age in New York.  He’s even checked Craigslist for good deals.

He has NO money.

“Oh, ya, we have to do this.”  My husband said.  “This is the exact kind of car he wants.”

The poor thing.  You should have seen his face light up like Times Square on New Year’s Eve when FringeMan exclaimed, “We found you a car!”  I think we broke his heart a little.

Now before you go and get too teary-eyed, he already got even with me.  Two nights ago I was laying on the couch watching a documentary with FringeMan when I just had to go to sleep.  It was the Benadryl fighting the super-hero histamine.

I headed off to bed, but with one pit-stop.  You guessed it – the bathroom.

When I flipped on the light switch and lifted the lid of the toilet seat, my heart jumped into my throat and I let out a scream.  There was an unsightly little black mouse sitting right on the seat. I about died.

We are even!

To tell you the truth, I think I may just be a teensy-bit behind him.  No fears.  I’ll get him when he least suspects it.



18 thoughts on “How NOT to Parent

  1. Pingback: Best of 2012 | the domestic fringe

  2. Jill

    When our daughter was younger, we told her we were aliens that had taken over her parents’ bodies. It wasn’t nice, but she totally deserved it! : )

    1. the domestic fringe Post author

      Ok, Jill. That’s hysterical. Not nice, but totally funny just the same. 😉 When my son was little he was convinced beyond doubt that I had eyes in the back of head. I played that up for a looong time!

  3. Mary

    And how come there is no picture of the mouse on the toilet seat? I would have loved to see that.

    That reminds me of the time my dd put a rubber snake in my washer. Talk about a heart attack. I immediately began yelling at my ds, who was clueless. It’s just that something like that was sooo him, and soooo NOT her! I was just about to choke him, and she was sitting over in the corner cracking up.

  4. Jenn

    Very nicely played FringeParents. (Applause) Tell FringeBoy if he needs any backup, I’ll already caught four. ;0)

    1. the domestic fringe Post author

      I still can’t believe he did that to me! The next day he told me that he got up to go potty and in his sleepiness forgot he put the mouse there. He scared himself first!! 🙂 I love it. It almost makes it ok that he gave me a hearty-tack.


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