Liposuction is looking better every day.
I was walking on the high-school track the other night feeling pretty darn good about my three miles. Heck, I even pumped and arm or two during my imaginary race around the circle. That is, until Granny showed up. This woman, who is considerably older, heavier, and more wrinkly than I, moved faster than the speed of my first car.
Is that really necessary? Does exercise have to half-kill you and make you scream “U-N-C-L-E” before the warm-up is complete?
I wasn’t born wearing spandex and Nike shoes. I’m not an athlete for heaven’s sake! Maybe there should be a schedule on the fence.
6-7 pm. – Speedwalkers and Runners
7-8 pm. – Everyone who looks good in Spandex
8-9 pm. – All Those Who Want to Hide Their Fat under the Cover of Darkness
Is it too much to ask? I’m just not a cardiovascular overachiever. I’m more of a buy a cute pair of yoga pants and stroll around the block type of gal. Sure I’d love the legs of a runner, I just don’t want to have to run to get them.
Maybe if I fall asleep to Chariots of Fire, I’ll wake up with legs of steel.
Ah, fugettaboutit. I’ll just pop some pop-corn, put my feet up, and throw the 30 Day Shred into the DVD player. Jillian works hard enough for all of us.
Despite my lazy girl’s approach to fitness, I have managed to lose 18 pounds. Then I hit a wall and haven’t dropped another ounce, but who’s counting anyhow?
I’m always curious to find out what successful people are doing to lose weight. Diet is subjective. What works for me, probably won’t work for you. I can’t swear off bagels for the rest of my life, and the thought of only drinking liquid food makes me want to run to the nearest fast-food joint and order a bacon cheeseburger. I’m sorry. I’m a fan of food.
But here’s the thing. I’d like to maybe try one of your favorite dieting foods or tips to lose weight and be healthier. If it worked for you, maybe it could work for me! And maybe, just maybe, I can get past this thick wall of fat.
So, I’m going to share a handful of my favorite foods I’ve eaten over and over again while on my diet (quest to skinny thighs in case you hate the word diet), and then you share (in the comments) what foods or workouts have helped you lose weight. It’s a bit of fat-fighting knowledge sharing. It’s cheaper than Weight-Watchers and I won’t make you step on a scale.
Here are my foods:
I generally cut the wraps in half, so that’s 45 calories. Then I spread on a thin layer of peanut butter, sprinkle on some granola, and lay a banana in the center. I roll it all up and it for breakfast or lunch.
I used the high protein granola bars if I’m on the run. They fill me up pretty well and can replace a breakfast or lunch if need be. Sometimes it’s hard not to be near home during mealtime and this is easy. I can just throw a bar in my purse.
The rest is just food. I’m a big fan of an egg for breakfast. Sometimes if I’m really hungry, I’ll have an egg and a slice of toast. I know. I’m a regular crazy woman.
One afternoon I emailed my friend (because we’re not cool enough to text each other) and told her I felt like I just went to the buffet. I ate 10 almonds, 10 mini rice cakes, and an apple. Hoo-ha! That’s living Baby!!
Fruit and almonds are my staple snacks. I generally eat 5 times a day.
So how about you? Have you experienced weight-loss success? Share your tips please. My thighs will be eternally grateful.
P.S. My toilet is sweating more than three fat men in a sauna. No offense sauna loving fat men, but I need to know how to stop a toilet from sweating. I hate stepping in puddles, because let’s face it, I have kids and I’m never 100% sure what I’m stepping in.
P.S.S. Thank you for all the kind comments on my new dress. I appreciate each of them. You know to make a girl feel good.