DIY = Hire Someone

You ever have one of those days when you think you can do anything?

Ya, me too.

You ever have one of those days when you think you can do anything, and then you screw everything up?

Ya, me too.

When I was at my aunts, we fed off each others estrogen and decided we could build a TV cabinet.  Now, we couldn’t carry the box with all the TV cabinet pieces out to the car, because it was too heavy, but we could operate a screw gun.  Besides, we had an extra three screwdrivers and a hammer.  We could have built the Empire State Building by the time we finished talking each other up.

It didn’t matter that we have no mechanical expertise, and who cares if we never built anything before.  We had instructions.  Heck, I took a class in college that taught me how to write those instructions.  No prob.

That’s what we said.  “No problem.”

Then I sat with the instructions in my lap looking at a photo for like twenty minutes.  “Why is this piece overhanging the unit?  It doesn’t make any sense?”

Of course it didn’t make sense.  It was a photo and they were showing the piece from the top.  It only looked like overhang, when really, it was perpective.

I should have known something was wrong then, but no.  We patted each other on the back and moved on.  We even managed to get the drawer pulls in the right way.

We were flying high and we promised ourselves a slice of chocolate pie after we were done.

Then we came to a piece that didn’t have pre-drilled holes and we railed on the manufacturer.

“They should have pre-drilled these holes like they did all the others.  How could they forget?”  We wondered.

And again, we should have known something was wrong, but we put some elbow grease into it and screwed the dang screws into that hardened press-board.  We are She-ra!

Before you know it, four hours had passed.  We were hungry, thirsty, and sweaty, but we were accomplished.  I took one end of the TV cabinet and my aunt held onto the other.  Then we flipped it and stood back to admire our handiwork.

“Um, why is that piece on the bottom upside down?”  I asked.

“We must have built it that way.”  She answered.

“What are we gonna do now?”

“Maybe we can flip the bottom piece.”  She said with hope in her voice.

“Na, that was the hard piece.  The one without the pre-drilled holes.  I put sixteen screws in that piece.  It’s brown swiss cheese at this point.”


“Maybe we can pull these drawers out a little and cover the wood?”

So I went over and pulled out the drawers.  Wouldn’t you know it.  They slid right back in.

“At least we did a good job on the drawers.”  I said.

“At least.”  She answered.

Better Homes and Gardens TV stand


6 thoughts on “DIY = Hire Someone

  1. debbie york

    I think the problem began when you read the directions. Chances are they were written by a man. A man who knew no self-respecting man would bother reading them, so why should he bother making ’em clear! See…not your fault!
    I think it looks pretty darn good..especially the knobs!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s